hot.

So, once upon a time, a long time ago (when I was in high school) I went with my dad to a big field of tomato plants and brought home what had to be at least a hundred big tomatoes.  They covered my mom's counters throughout the whole kitchen.  Then we said...um...what are we going to do with all of these tomatoes?  So my parents found a good salsa recipe, and my family ventured into making many jars of salsa.  And I learned that you should wear gloves when cutting up zillions of jalapeños.

Then my mom's counters were full of jars that were full of salsa.  And we thought...um....what are we going to do with all of these jars full of salsa?  So my parents decided to give them away to their friends.  But first, of course, we needed a label.  And to have a label, you need a name.  And so because of my Dad's sick sense of humor (mine had to come from somewhere), the "Fireass" brand of salsa was born.

And I got to create the label for it.  On Print Shop.

We thought it was pretty spectacular.  

As the years progressed, however, and the old computer went on to the great Circuit City in the sky, we had to recreate the label.  Version 2 never had the ooomph that version 1 had in it's little dot-matrixy design and fabulous Print Shop clip art, so last year, we took it seriously and decided that Hoon's Therapeutic Gardens needed an updated, cool label for the Fireass brand of salsa.  

As the last few jars of the 2010 batch are being consumed by my family, my parents have been busy making a 2011 batch; naked jars ready for their labels once again.  Here's what will be slapped on the glass once again this year: the ever-classy donkey with its butt on fire.

stencil.

I told you I loved Damask. This was a special order for a friend that needs a stencil of damask that incorporates African herd animal heads.  Why wouldn't that be something you could just pick up in the wallpaper store?  Well it should be.

bathroom.

 Ah, good ol' bathroom humor.  So, one of my hubby's cousins is getting married, and apparently when he was younger, he thought these little framed sayings that my fabulous mother in law had in the bathroom were hilarious.  He later asked to have them, but I guess they were long gone at that point, so my mom-in-law had the idea of recreating them on a couple of 4x6 cards to be framed and given to the lucky couple just for laughs.

While the originals were apparently a western theme...Yeeeehaaaaw, she gave me free reign on the updated versions.  So, here is my take on toilet paper and...ahem..."sprinkles" in what I felt was a somewhat classy depiction.

I love the sprinkle/tinkle saying, by the way.  My friend Erin first introduced it to me in High School, only her take was "be a sweetie and wipe the seatie."